I met Dobi during my last visit to the Drug and Alcohol
Addicts Center. Dobi is a woman in her 50s, intelligent and still beautiful.
Once she was a brave and joyful young woman who enjoyed life and tried extreme
sports like parachuting. Yet, with the years she became victim of alcohol and
this broke her world to pieces. As I looked in her eyes I realized how much she
is ashamed and sorry of her being here.
After we talked a little bit about where she came from and
what her job was, I asked her. “Dobi, what do you think about the Supernatural
reality. Is there a God?” She said: “Well, I think there is some sort of a
power…”
Most of the Bulgarians claim they are Orthodox Christians.
Yet, when they have to define what this really means and how God looks like
they say that God is just an impersonal power.
Whenever I hear this answer I feel like asking, “That is a
very safe thing to say, isn’t it?” On one hand, knowing that the person who
asks you is a Christian (and a pastor!) you don’t want to hurt him by saying
you don’t believe in the existence of God.
On the other, you decide to simply create a god in your
image and likeness. A god that is close enough to help you when you call him
and not too close to interfere in your life. Because you realize that God, if
he exists, is holy, you can’t bear this.
People want the benefits of being a Christian but avoid the
responsibilities a follower of Christ should have. It's like what happened to
Bulgaria after the fall of communism. We wanted the benefits of freedom and the
free market economy but have ever since been avoiding the responsibilities of living under the
supremacy of law. We try to suppress the trauma of living in an orderly
society.
As the Swiss theologian Karl Barth puts it, “religion is a
result of the suppressing of the trauma caused by God's holiness.” People avoid
their fear and shame in meeting the real God by choosing to create their own
‘safe’ religion and gods.
Yet the Bible tells us that worship of our selves or idols
is called idolatry. And idolatry is a sin. The only way we can avoid idolatry
and face the trauma of meeting the holy God is through God’s grace. We can find
shelter from God’s fearful holiness in Jesus’ wounds.
As we were talking about the difference between dead
religion and personal faith in Jesus Dobi was listening. I could tell this was
the first time when she, similarly to many others, had to face the real God in
her life. She had to deal with the trauma of meeting the holy God. She had to
make that jump and open her Parachute. Trust Jesus. I hope she will.